let's learn some lingo!

[The Underdweller]

Sorry, I meant asthetically wrong! My Japanese isn't very good, but I think this is it:

スペースマリーンはボルトガンをうつかうたないかのうちにスノットリングはパンツをげりをした。
Supesu Marin wa Boltogan oh utsu ka utanai ka no uchi ni snotringu wa pantsu oh geri oh shita.

Whether or not the Space Marine fired his bolt gun, the snotling had diarrhea?

[Tenorikuma]

I think you could use ちびった to mean "soiled oneself" in colloquial terms.

Although 下痢に襲われちゃった (geri-ni osoware-chatta) "was stricken with diarrhea" would do the trick as well.

[jus]

This is fun, we should have more topics like this.

[Primarch]

私は日本語がぜんぜん分かりません。私はとてもさいあくです。
今日本語を勉強したい。教えて下さい。

[Admiral-Badruck]

日本語は難しいすぎる 。僕はほとんど開けら見ました。

[me_in_japan]

Righty ho some marvellous scatological examples there.

Today's useful lingo wot I learned wos:

How to be polite on t' phone.

When calling someone, you say...

もしもし(company)の(name)と申します。

(other person's name)はいらっしゃいますか？

*other person is put on the line, probably after their phone-answering companion says "お待ちくださいませ。"*

Then he/she says "(name)です" or "(name)でございます。"
Followed by "お世話になっております", which you also say.

Ok, a conversational example. Dave of Nagoyahammer inc. is calling Games Workshop inc. and wishes to speak with BossTroll.

*ringlyringlyring*
TrollMinion: GamesWorkshopのTrollMinionでございます。
Dave: NagoyaHammerのDaveと申します。BossTrollさんがいらっしゃいますか?
TM: はい。少々をまちくださいませ。
D:はい。
BossTroll:こんにちは。BossTrollでございます。
D: こんにちは。NagoyahammerのDaveと申します。
BT: お世話になっております。
D: お世話になっております。*insert the point of the phone call here.*


So, dat is today's possibly not very useful at all Japanese. Please feel free to correct any bits wot are stupid sounding. Also, if you can finish the conversation in an amusing manner, you score today's brownie point

[Primarch]

and the example wot I hope strings em all together...

生徒はチャイムを鳴るか鳴らないかのうちに、教室から出て行った。
seito ha chaimu wo naruka naranaika nouchini, kyoushitsu kara deteitta.

No sooner had the bell rung than the students left the classroom.

Just been told it should be chaimu GA, rather than chaimu WO. Dunno if that makes much difference.

[Tenorikuma]

One thing you need to know for phone calls: people calling you on the cell phone will usually start by asking if it is convenient for you to talk. The request is phrased 今、よろしいでしょうか。"ima, yoroshii deshou ka" i.e. "is now a good time?"

[me_in_japan]

Good point, ten. Ta

Good point Prim, too. Particles always screw me up bane o my life, so they are

[Primarch]

Good point Prim, too. Particles always screw me up bane o my life, so they are

Shouldn't that be 'Bane GA my life' or am I mistaken?